Other things nobody told you

Yes, having a child changes your life. You can't do your nails too often. You don't wear long earrings and necklaces. Day-time sex is over, and so is going out till morning. Sad. And fairly truth. But every cloud has a silver lining.

-Having a child improves your creativity.

Disney headquarters. Seven well paid creative employees with colorful post’ its conduct a brainstorming. They come up with the idea of talking cars. Great success.

My kitchen. Daniel eats lentils while playing with a red and a blue car. Blahblah says the blue car. Tatata, answers the red one. Yummy lentils for the red one, kisses for the blue one...

-You stay in better hotels (guilt-free)

I know not everybody will think this is something good but for me, after years of visiting wonders of the world while dreaming about a hot shower, sleeping in a room with locker feels just nice. I don't know if I became a bit posh with age or I always was and I just came out of the closet.

-Makes you a better person

A child screaming and rolling in the floor is a great exercise for patient and chastity. Besides, there is a not so known side effect about having a child. I can't read anymore news about children in the newspaper. It really makes me crazy. Since Dani is in the world I realized I could personally cut the testicles to anyone that harms a baby. If there is anyone thinking that's mother instinct, just know that Martin admits to feel exactly the same way. Well, in summary, making a child might make you join Unicef.

-You make a better use of your time.

Yes, I know. Since you have a child you can't rest in the sofa the whole Sunday watching crap in the TV. Now, you and I know this is not a bad thing. Besides, a mother get's so efficient sometimes it is scary. I am able to pack, no matter if for a business trip or a picnic in the park, in less than ten minutes. Single handed.

-It is a one-size-fits-all excuse

Why you cannot attend that horrible event your mother-in-law is planning? The child got lice.

Did you forget your best friends' birthday? No wonder, the child has been terribly sick the whole week.

And of course, the classic, who broke Martin's new iPad?

-Improves the relationship with your mother

Because you are suddenly able to stand anything just for those afternoons she stays with the baby and you can rest in the sofa and watch crap in the TV. 

-Test your relationship (and eventually improves it)

A friend used to tell me she needs a certain amount of drama for her romantic relationships to succeed. Do you want drama? Try getting pregnant. Engineers call that "stress test" and if you pass it, you know no dirty shock can separate you. Well, at least you are happy believing that.

-And last but not least, even if it is a temporal effect, your tits grow.